I think I might be ready.
"Ready for what?" you may wonder.
Ready for school. Ready for work. Ready for life.
I've done a lot of healing since I left Minnesota. I learned a lot; I grew. I've published books and have ghostwritten blogs and articles. I've taken walks on trails and throughout the community. I've visited coffee shops, watched the Northern Lights, and throughout it all made some really cool friends.
But now it's time to continue the growth.
I am going to college in the fall, provided my FAFSA gets done on time (waiting for info.) If it doesn't? Well, that's the other part of this. I'm looking for a job.
I've submitted three resumes by email, hand delivered an application (with my resume obviously), and am in the process of getting more applications and applying for more places. I'm a little scared about how this will all turn out. I'm about as scared of getting a job as I am of not getting one.
I haven't worked a traditional job since mid-2013.
I'm applying for part-time. I'm applying for full time. I'm applying mostly for jobs that don't involve people. But there are a few customer service oriented jobs in there including an office assistant job at the nearby college.
I'm also applying for scholarships.
While I might not get them, this is a very important step for me. I'm working towards bringing every aspect of my future into my own hands.
Am I still tempted to pack a backpack and bus to Colorado?
Absolutely. That will always be there. But I recognize that, right now, it would not be my best option. I need to get my BA and a little more work history before I can modern-day nomad. So until then, that's my plan. School. Job. Skills. Saving.
Currently I live with my fiance who lost his job about a month ago. We're trying to get by with our lack of a usable vehicle (no registration/insurance), our lack of income until one of us gets a job, and our lack of any idea what the future holds for us. We're both working to make this work. We're both healing.
I'm ready to handle what life throws my way. I'm just hoping one of the things it throws is a job or scholarship.
Stay Awesome,
Alexandria
Sunday, August 2, 2015
Thursday, June 25, 2015
Just Because I need to write this down part two
Yet again you've come across another list of my ideas of things I need to create and do and learn that I will otherwise forget because I don't have the time or energy to do them now. Some of these are even a year old. *Cough* cat purrs * Cough* Hence what I mean by needing to write them down. Luckily some of these have made their way into conversation and so are less easy to forget but hey, always nice to have them somewhere besides my brain.
- Harnessing cat purrs into usable energy
- Find someone that understands stuff like this
- Or just learn it all mahself
- And then employ someone to do the actual complex mathematics. Because there will definitely be complex mathematics.
- On a related note, making shakelight style phone chargers
- WHY HAS NOBODY DONE THIS YET??
- Solving the problem of death by "old age"
- We don't actually die of old age. Ever.
- Evolution doesn't care about how old we get.
- Metabolism and other "normal" things kill us.
- Yes I'm serious.
- Inventing a robot that would take my garbage out for me.
- Kidding. Mostly.
- Write a recipe book where everything is garlic based
- Make the title some terrible vampire pun
- Figure out how to write a "cozy mystery"
- And write one
- Because apparently they're popular right now
- Although I could just do a murder mystery instead
- Always a good idea
- Get a fitness specialist certification
- And do pretty much nothing with it because how does one even fitness business?
- The knowledge would be pretty cool though.
- Write a page on my life for every year of my life.
- Write pages for the last 21 years as well.
- Try to become a centenarian.
- Make sure someone knows to publish it when I die.
- Do the picture a day for a year thing
- And actually keep up with it
- Learn how to French Braid
- Learn how to write a sales copy
- What even is a sales copy?
- Using the term grown (as in grown ass woman) in a photo series about the fact that I'm a "grown" adult but I like crayons and glitter, etc.
- The term has been used too often recently
- Liking cartoons does not make you not an adult
- The stereotypes attributed to adults is irksome
- Create a book series based on current events
- to help educate people
- so when someone says "this is unrealistic" I can show them WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED.
So these are more of my ideas. Within the next 3-5 days expect a post that touches Charleston, Racism, and my ex. It's a thing that is important to me and it is a thing that I feel needs to be said.
Monday, June 15, 2015
Biphasic/Siesta Sleep
Biphasic sleep. This involves sleeping twice a day, or as shown by the phrase "siesta sleep" it's basically a "normal" chunk of sleep plus towards the middle of your day give or take.
Yes, I know. I've tried this before and stopped. But that was years ago and I was operating under different circumstances.
Right now I am in Michigan, I live with my fiance. I am a stay-at-home freelancer with no set schedule for anything. This is actually not the perfect setup for biphasic sleep but it's actually pretty good.
The perfect setup is having a set schedule that already allows for a "break" in the middle of the day. Like having classes go until noon and not start again until 3 or something like that. That is the perfect setup.
So I'm setting up a "schedule."
Biphasic sleep, or siesta sleep which is a much less controversial term, has two parts. The first part is the main chunk of sleep. Most of the time this is between 5-7 hours, depending on how long your nap is and how much sleep you need.
For me, I'm going with about 6 hours. I'll go to sleep earlier if I'm tired earlier. Allowing that part to be relatively fluid because I need to figure out how much sleep I need anyways.
Next is the nap. The nap can either be something like 20-30 minutes (a power nap) or 60-90 minutes. I'm going the power nap route this time. Last time, I tried for about two hours. This was not a good idea. Some people are more inclined to longer naps, some are for shorter. If I'm napping, it needs to be short - even if it is under the term biphasic sleep.
The difference between biphasic sleep and a nap has to do more with the routine, anyways. When your body is used to taking a nap every day at a certain time, it goes through the two phases.
Amusingly enough, I think this will allow my wake-ups to be easier.
My naps should probably be before or after lunch. I'm going to start on after lunch and see how that goes. The good things about after lunch is that it's middle of my day and it should hopefully be right before I'd hang out with someone. So yay, right? We'll see.
Anyways, toodle-oo
-Alexandria Hathaway
Yes, I know. I've tried this before and stopped. But that was years ago and I was operating under different circumstances.
Right now I am in Michigan, I live with my fiance. I am a stay-at-home freelancer with no set schedule for anything. This is actually not the perfect setup for biphasic sleep but it's actually pretty good.
The perfect setup is having a set schedule that already allows for a "break" in the middle of the day. Like having classes go until noon and not start again until 3 or something like that. That is the perfect setup.
So I'm setting up a "schedule."
Biphasic sleep, or siesta sleep which is a much less controversial term, has two parts. The first part is the main chunk of sleep. Most of the time this is between 5-7 hours, depending on how long your nap is and how much sleep you need.
For me, I'm going with about 6 hours. I'll go to sleep earlier if I'm tired earlier. Allowing that part to be relatively fluid because I need to figure out how much sleep I need anyways.
Next is the nap. The nap can either be something like 20-30 minutes (a power nap) or 60-90 minutes. I'm going the power nap route this time. Last time, I tried for about two hours. This was not a good idea. Some people are more inclined to longer naps, some are for shorter. If I'm napping, it needs to be short - even if it is under the term biphasic sleep.
The difference between biphasic sleep and a nap has to do more with the routine, anyways. When your body is used to taking a nap every day at a certain time, it goes through the two phases.
Amusingly enough, I think this will allow my wake-ups to be easier.
My naps should probably be before or after lunch. I'm going to start on after lunch and see how that goes. The good things about after lunch is that it's middle of my day and it should hopefully be right before I'd hang out with someone. So yay, right? We'll see.
Anyways, toodle-oo
-Alexandria Hathaway
Monday, June 8, 2015
Just Because I Need to Write These Down
I get way to many ideas and they're all going to escape me so here is just a big list of my current ideas on random things that involve obscure references and oddity.
- Secrets of The Job Process Book... Series... Blog... Website... Something.
- Awhile ago I wanted to do a thing about all the different job related stuff because nobody seems to understand how resumes work. Nobody understands how interviews work. And nobody seems to understand that you don't just miss a day and not call in.
- This idea was shelved because effort and stuff.
- And because I'd have to get a new retail job for research.
- Get a Retail Job.
- For research.
- And hilarity.
- Plus the cash wouldn't hurt.
- Make a book about a crazy adrenaline-obsessed person who must continue to do crazy awesome things in order to avoid depression.
- And don't rip off the Pretties or whatever that one book was.
- Which I just now realized was a thing.
- Of course that's not even the actual premise of their book.
- So I'll be good.
- I have a friend like this. More research is needed.
- Obviously some details will be fabricated. Because fiction.
- Have different days where I go to different places to do my work.
- Like the library one day.
- And coffee another day.
- And all that jazz.
- Would fit well with a retail job.
- Make a blog full of article samples.
- But then someone might take them for their own in an attempt to get a job and so that would be bad.
- Make a How To Elance kind of site.
- Because Fuck the "water cooler."
- Write a huge philosophically intense book... that all ends with a dick joke.
- Write a book that seems like it's just a bunch of dick jokes but is actually philosophically intense.
- Actually succeed at finding a sleep schedule that fits me.
- Actually take a typing test and then try to improve said typing score because I can't type as fast as I think and it gets annoying.
- Holy shit you could literally see how fast you think by increasing your typing score until you can type as fast as you think and then you could be like "I think about 110 words per minute."
- Of course this would only work if you thought:
- At a speed slower than the response time of a key press
- Only thought one thing at once
- Unless you could type like 110 words a minute on both hands on separate keyboards. But that's only two lines of thought.
- Work on that whole ambidextrous thing again. Cause that was legit.
- Learn how to Leatherwork.
- Get materials for leatherwork.
- Learn how to treat wood.
- Get materials to treat wood.
- Actually have an exercise routine of some sort.
- Because my arms are way too flabby.
- And they need to be stronger so I can use my saws effectively.
- Because I need to be able to outrun bees.
- Because I want to be a ninja.
- Write that one book on productivity.
- Actually get to the point where I have successfully learned how to be that productive.
- Write a book that showcases the cost of someone's time, regardless of what they're doing.
- Because you're not paying me to scan your groceries, you're paying me to not do anything else I could be doing at that moment.
- Work on a book about effective ways to handle anxiety.
- And do a bunch of blog posts on the subject so people don't have to spend money to not have anxiety attacks. That would stop them from making money/conversing/living.
- Learn how to use my sewing machine or get a newer one.
- Because I need to figure out how to do the halter top thing I was planning on doing.
- And because Story Bears are still a thing.
Congratulations. You just spent your time reading all this stuff. Now go make your own list. You know you have those ideas. Do them.
Saturday, May 9, 2015
Part Two of my Food Intolerance Journey!
Fried Foods week was not as hard core as any other week has been thus far. It was very laid back. My conclusion? Moderation, moderation, moderation.
Honestly though, this week wasn't as needed as it would've been a year ago. This is because I stopped using as much oil. When I was younger I would use WAY more oil than was needed. Everything needed to be deep fried. Now? I do the cute little teaspoon thing.
So I just need to keep doing the small teaspoon for frying and make sure my week doesn't consist of only pan-seared foods. This is easy.
Simple stuff.
Next week we move on to sugar. By sugar, I mean no sugar. Nada. I have lots of veggies and noodles and other things so I don't have to be too concerned. The goal of this week is to see if no sugar makes me feel better.
If I feel the same, I'll resume my sugar eating habits. If I feel better, I'll just use moderation with my sugar and mostly stick to the unprocessed stuff. (I.e. less soda.)
Remember, this is all based on how I feel and is only happening to make me feel better. I feel I should mention that because some people cut out sugar for other reasons and those are not my reasons. My reasons involve my stomach, my fatigue, and just in general how I feel.
In other news, Wings is out on Amazon. Which is nice. I'm walking to cats almost every time they're open, which is cool. This also means I'm getting some exercise.
I've also been trying to get better at not taking on too much at a time. Believe it or not, I've been improving. This is great news, especially since I've just started an online course on elance. Hopefully my funds will go up and my stress will go down. That's the plan anyways.
Finally, for those of you paying attention and for those of you interested in helping out with the car situation, here is the fancy progress bar and how to help! From what I know of the car, we have definite transmission issues and potential intake problems. NEW! We now also have suspension problems!
And all the cars problems are expensive, so working towards getting a new car would be beneficial.
Apparently there's also the potential of the car exploding. This would be exciting if it didn't mean potential injury/death.
Honestly though, this week wasn't as needed as it would've been a year ago. This is because I stopped using as much oil. When I was younger I would use WAY more oil than was needed. Everything needed to be deep fried. Now? I do the cute little teaspoon thing.
So I just need to keep doing the small teaspoon for frying and make sure my week doesn't consist of only pan-seared foods. This is easy.
Simple stuff.
Next week we move on to sugar. By sugar, I mean no sugar. Nada. I have lots of veggies and noodles and other things so I don't have to be too concerned. The goal of this week is to see if no sugar makes me feel better.
If I feel the same, I'll resume my sugar eating habits. If I feel better, I'll just use moderation with my sugar and mostly stick to the unprocessed stuff. (I.e. less soda.)
Remember, this is all based on how I feel and is only happening to make me feel better. I feel I should mention that because some people cut out sugar for other reasons and those are not my reasons. My reasons involve my stomach, my fatigue, and just in general how I feel.
In other news, Wings is out on Amazon. Which is nice. I'm walking to cats almost every time they're open, which is cool. This also means I'm getting some exercise.
I've also been trying to get better at not taking on too much at a time. Believe it or not, I've been improving. This is great news, especially since I've just started an online course on elance. Hopefully my funds will go up and my stress will go down. That's the plan anyways.
Finally, for those of you paying attention and for those of you interested in helping out with the car situation, here is the fancy progress bar and how to help! From what I know of the car, we have definite transmission issues and potential intake problems. NEW! We now also have suspension problems!
And all the cars problems are expensive, so working towards getting a new car would be beneficial.
Apparently there's also the potential of the car exploding. This would be exciting if it didn't mean potential injury/death.
Tuesday, May 5, 2015
2nd Book Officially Out!
Many of you have been waiting for this announcement from me. I promised it a little earlier than this but I forgot about the verification stage involved in self-publishing.
Without further ado I present to you Wings. Fully published in both ebook and paperback form. My website has been updated to show this awesome new step.
The next step for Wings, as well as An Addictive Personality, is to become an audio book.
I will be recording the MP3 of myself reading the books out loud and will attempt to figure out how to create my own site shop where I can receive payment for this audio and send it out to buyers. If anyone has any suggestions, please let me know.
I do not want to use a "publishing platform" for the MP3 version, I want it to be exclusively available through me and my website.
The journey to publish Wings has been long. Longer than I expected, actually. Writing it was very, very quick due to the 10k writing challenge day that I completed a while back. Then I did the traditional thing of leaving it and not touching it for a good month. Then I procrastinated editing it for a while.
It was very hard to come back to. I wasn't sure exactly how I should go about editing it and what I should do with it. So it sat for long periods of time. Then it got to the point where I just decided to go all out and I used two documents to figure everything out.
There were some easy parts and there were hard ones but I finally got it all edited up. From there I needed to finish my book cover. I had the front cover completely finished, but I didn't have a back cover. I worked on it, (Thanks mom!) uploaded it, and after one re-upload it was completed.
Now it's out there. It's out there to read. It's out there to enjoy. It's out there to provide a narrative.
Thank you. Everyone.
-Alexandria Younk
Without further ado I present to you Wings. Fully published in both ebook and paperback form. My website has been updated to show this awesome new step.
The next step for Wings, as well as An Addictive Personality, is to become an audio book.
I will be recording the MP3 of myself reading the books out loud and will attempt to figure out how to create my own site shop where I can receive payment for this audio and send it out to buyers. If anyone has any suggestions, please let me know.
I do not want to use a "publishing platform" for the MP3 version, I want it to be exclusively available through me and my website.
The journey to publish Wings has been long. Longer than I expected, actually. Writing it was very, very quick due to the 10k writing challenge day that I completed a while back. Then I did the traditional thing of leaving it and not touching it for a good month. Then I procrastinated editing it for a while.
It was very hard to come back to. I wasn't sure exactly how I should go about editing it and what I should do with it. So it sat for long periods of time. Then it got to the point where I just decided to go all out and I used two documents to figure everything out.
There were some easy parts and there were hard ones but I finally got it all edited up. From there I needed to finish my book cover. I had the front cover completely finished, but I didn't have a back cover. I worked on it, (Thanks mom!) uploaded it, and after one re-upload it was completed.
Now it's out there. It's out there to read. It's out there to enjoy. It's out there to provide a narrative.
Thank you. Everyone.
-Alexandria Younk
Monday, April 27, 2015
The Shelter Cats and Why I Need Them
Mary. Stella. Simba. These names have been uttered by me an awful lot. They belong to three beautiful cats at the Humane Society nearby.
While they may not mean much to you, they mean the world to me.
First, I love cats. I love all furry animals and even non-furry animals. I have two betta fish at my apartment. There are four cats plus my turtle at my parents house. My favorite animal is the grey wolf. Humane societies? They're awesome for animal lovers.
But this love is not just about loving animals.
It's about needing their care, their affection, their quirks, even their moody days. And them needing me. It's about my anxiety and my need to nurture. It's about personal growth. It's about saving lives. It's about my depression and finding beauty in every single day. This is why I need these cats.
When I first moved to Michigan I was still having high anxiety. It was less than it was in Minnesota, sure, but it was still making life hard for me. I somehow managed to publish An Addictive Personality and pull a 10k Writing Marathon. Progress.
But anxiety caught up to me and I wasn't able to do much else. What was I going to do with my days? I started aching for something to nurture. I wanted something small and warm. I really wanted a pet. And not just any pet. I wanted a cat, a dog, or some kind of rodent larger than a hamster.
Of course, I can't own one. The apartment does not allow pets. This is a common problem.
So here is where the humane society comes in.
We started going there and met all the pretty kitties. They were awesome. I loved them. The more we went... the better I felt.
I felt good enough to restart freelancing.
It was an amazing thing. I began to actually work on things. I started working a little more on Wings and other projects. I did some mturk tasks. I didn't feel like every day was one step closer to a potential anxiety attack.
The more I came, the better I got to know the cats. Mary is described as a "diva." She does not like one too many pets and she wasn't too friendly towards people she didn't recognize. She started warming up. Now every time I can pet her I feel pretty great because I know that it's because I put effort into getting to know her.
Mary taught me a lesson about working to get to know someone. A lot of times people think they know each other long before they actually do. They think they know a lot because they talk a lot and hang out a lot but there are sides that take a long time to see. And so Mary taught me to be patient for those layers to show themselves.
Stella is described in terms much less nice. She has been at the shelter for a very, very long time. After gaining Mary's trust, attention to Stella became a thing. She already understood that I was a frequent visitor, which helped matters. Cats like stability, too.
Eventually, she allowed me to pet her and actually has sat in my lap a couple times. Her biggest thing appears to be trust. Trust and stability.
I don't know much about Stella's past and frankly I don't know if I want to know. Maybe she was just never around humans, but maybe it's something much worse. What I care about is that she has grown and adapted and is well taken care of.
Stella is teaching me about how long it really takes to trust someone and about taking baby steps. She has taught me restraint as I make sure not to pet her when she is likely to be upset. Moreso, she is teaching me how stability of my actions has an effect on others. I feel like this is a very important lesson.
Then we have Simba. Simba is constantly bullied by other kitties. I'm not sure why, though he is a little standoffish. It's widely accepted that a single kitty home might be best for him, especially one where he can be left alone a lot. Simba has taught me about personal space, reading a person's discomfort level, and about how to make yourself seem like a safe person.
I didn't begin to work with Simba until February when I decided to sponsor him. I had already learned some restraint and had grown up knowing how to respect animals, so I wasn't a threat to him. But I also wasn't his friend.
Simba needs a lot of personal space, so I learned how to read the signs about when he needed it. And I knew not to go after him. Because I respected this and took the time to learn about him, but didn't neglect to offer petting and treats, he began to see me as "safe."
Since then, he's still standoffish, but when he sees me he comes to get a head rub. And when other cats are bullying him and my lap is clear, he'll jump on up.
Edited to add: These are my personal opinions and experiences about the cats. Your results/opinions may vary.
That's actually another thing, all the cats have learned or are in the process of learning that my lap is a no-brat zone. Meaning no batting or growling or hissing at cats to cats on my lap or from cats on my lap. So far it's worked surprisingly well.
And that is why I need them.
Also, because they've helped me so much, I've started to sponsor them. I sponsored Simba in February, Rory in March, and I finally got the funds to sponsor Monica for April! This way I'll help them find new homes.
Oh, a quick update - Not doing no-sugar week this week. Not because "I can't handle not having sugar" but because that's the kind of thing you REALLY need to plan ahead for. I learned this only AFTER checking labels of foods.
Fried food week goes on as planned starting on the 3rd. Because I have more than enough oil and things to fry.
Love the felines in your life,
-Alexandria
Oh, and for those of you interested in helping out with the car situation, here is the fancy progress bar and how to help! From what I know of the car, we have definite transmission issues and potential intake problems. And all the cars problems are expensive, so working towards getting a new car would be beneficial.
Apparently there's also the potential of the car exploding. This would be exciting if it didn't mean potential injury/death.
While they may not mean much to you, they mean the world to me.
 |
| Mary |
But this love is not just about loving animals.
It's about needing their care, their affection, their quirks, even their moody days. And them needing me. It's about my anxiety and my need to nurture. It's about personal growth. It's about saving lives. It's about my depression and finding beauty in every single day. This is why I need these cats.
When I first moved to Michigan I was still having high anxiety. It was less than it was in Minnesota, sure, but it was still making life hard for me. I somehow managed to publish An Addictive Personality and pull a 10k Writing Marathon. Progress.
 |
| Stella |
Of course, I can't own one. The apartment does not allow pets. This is a common problem.
So here is where the humane society comes in.
We started going there and met all the pretty kitties. They were awesome. I loved them. The more we went... the better I felt.
I felt good enough to restart freelancing.
It was an amazing thing. I began to actually work on things. I started working a little more on Wings and other projects. I did some mturk tasks. I didn't feel like every day was one step closer to a potential anxiety attack.
 |
| Simba |
Mary taught me a lesson about working to get to know someone. A lot of times people think they know each other long before they actually do. They think they know a lot because they talk a lot and hang out a lot but there are sides that take a long time to see. And so Mary taught me to be patient for those layers to show themselves.
Stella is described in terms much less nice. She has been at the shelter for a very, very long time. After gaining Mary's trust, attention to Stella became a thing. She already understood that I was a frequent visitor, which helped matters. Cats like stability, too.
Eventually, she allowed me to pet her and actually has sat in my lap a couple times. Her biggest thing appears to be trust. Trust and stability.
I don't know much about Stella's past and frankly I don't know if I want to know. Maybe she was just never around humans, but maybe it's something much worse. What I care about is that she has grown and adapted and is well taken care of.
 |
| Rory |
Then we have Simba. Simba is constantly bullied by other kitties. I'm not sure why, though he is a little standoffish. It's widely accepted that a single kitty home might be best for him, especially one where he can be left alone a lot. Simba has taught me about personal space, reading a person's discomfort level, and about how to make yourself seem like a safe person.
I didn't begin to work with Simba until February when I decided to sponsor him. I had already learned some restraint and had grown up knowing how to respect animals, so I wasn't a threat to him. But I also wasn't his friend.
Simba needs a lot of personal space, so I learned how to read the signs about when he needed it. And I knew not to go after him. Because I respected this and took the time to learn about him, but didn't neglect to offer petting and treats, he began to see me as "safe."
Since then, he's still standoffish, but when he sees me he comes to get a head rub. And when other cats are bullying him and my lap is clear, he'll jump on up.
Edited to add: These are my personal opinions and experiences about the cats. Your results/opinions may vary.
That's actually another thing, all the cats have learned or are in the process of learning that my lap is a no-brat zone. Meaning no batting or growling or hissing at cats to cats on my lap or from cats on my lap. So far it's worked surprisingly well.
 |
| Monica |
And that is why I need them.
Also, because they've helped me so much, I've started to sponsor them. I sponsored Simba in February, Rory in March, and I finally got the funds to sponsor Monica for April! This way I'll help them find new homes.
Oh, a quick update - Not doing no-sugar week this week. Not because "I can't handle not having sugar" but because that's the kind of thing you REALLY need to plan ahead for. I learned this only AFTER checking labels of foods.
Fried food week goes on as planned starting on the 3rd. Because I have more than enough oil and things to fry.
Love the felines in your life,
-Alexandria
Oh, and for those of you interested in helping out with the car situation, here is the fancy progress bar and how to help! From what I know of the car, we have definite transmission issues and potential intake problems. And all the cars problems are expensive, so working towards getting a new car would be beneficial.
Apparently there's also the potential of the car exploding. This would be exciting if it didn't mean potential injury/death.
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